- Some of these significant events may include your first date or meeting her friends,Make An Influence On but nothing will test your resolve more than meeting her parents for the first time. It’s a frightening circumstance, so let’s go through some dos and don’ts just in case.
Make An Influence On Your Girlfriend’s Parents
Unless they specifically claim otherwise, you’re talking to “Mr.” and “Mrs.”. I’m fully aware of the fact they have first names, but you’d not on a first name basis just yet. That’ll happen when it has to happen.
Bring a Gift
It doesn’t have to be something big, but a nice bottle of wine to share over dinner can break the ice in more than one way. Just remember that red wine is for red meats only. Everything else goes with a nice dry white. Thank me later.
Don’t Look At Your Phone
Yes, we know you’d rather be somewhere else, but stop making it so obvious. Be in the moment and at least make it look like you want to get to know everything about these people. Your internet persona can survive unattended for a few hours.
You only get one shot at a first impression, so at least dress for the occasion. You don’t need to arrive in a full costume, but ironing a shirt never killed anyone. At least not if you do it carefully. Jeans are fine as long as they don’t have holes in them or look overly washed.
Work may be bugging you to hell and back, there’s no reason to bring that up in the first conversation you’re having with your future in-laws. You’re a great person that has everything worked out and can offer their daughter the stability she needs, remember?
Show Your Girl Some Love
And by that I don’t mean start making out on the couch, but look at her affectionately, make eye contact frequently, laugh at her jokes, touch her gently, … Show these people that you actually love their daughter.
Every family has their quirks that you’re not aware of as an outsider. Ask your girlfriend for some pointers on what topics to avoid and which topics to actively work towards. Maybe her dad loves politics, but not the part of politics where foreigners get to vote. You’d be better off being aware of that minefield before you enter the room.
Do your homework
Before you meet your girlfriend’s parents you should get to know a little bit about them. And if you’ve already met, then it couldn’t hurt to learn a bit more about them before you meet up the next time. Ask your girlfriend a few basic things about them, such as what they do for a living, where they’re from, what their hobbies are, or anything else that can help you make a connection. Even something like a shared favorite sports team, or the fact that you and your girlfriend’s mother are in the same line of work can help you make conversation and build a connection.
If you learn that you have something in common with her parents, don’t bring it up the second you meet them. Wait for a quiet moment in the conversation to say something like, “So, Mr. Smith, I hear you’re also a huge Cubs fan.”
Be frank with your girlfriend instead of trying to elicit the information from her. Tell her that you want to know a few things about her parents to find common ground.
You can even ask her what her parents are like, if you haven’t met them before. If you know that her father is sarcastic or that her mother is really talkative in advance, then you can be even more prepared to hang out with them.
Some families are really easy to connect with while others aren’t. Ultimately, treat the experience as though you’re getting to know a new person.